Who keeps the paws? Do I need to share the dog too?

Jack and Jill had a fight over their family golden retriever, Honey Bun.  Jill refuses to allow Jack to take the dog with him in his new apartment.  Honey Bun is Jack's dog.  He was the one who decided to buy it, against Jill's wish, but now she refuses to let Honey Bun go live with Jack.  Jill claims that Honey Bun truly belongs to the children who are very attached to their family pet and as a result, the dog should remain with them in the family home. 
 

Couples who go through separation and divorce can spend a lot of time fighting over how they will divide their personal property like the home, the pension plan and the furniture.  Often, bitter disputes arise about who will get to keep the family pet.  The family dog or cat is as much a member of the family as anyone else and it can be very difficult to part with them. 

When deciding who should get “custody” of the family pet, people focus on their own personal wants and desires and on what they feel would be best for the pet (or for themselves).  Sometimes one spouse uses the pet to try to exert control over the other spouse – and sometimes it works... When there are kids involved, the family pet often becomes a football as the parents figure that where it lands will be where the children will want to land as well.

But here is one thing you might not know:  in the family law landscape, a pet is considered a piece of property (it seems cruel doesn’t it?) and if the issue of who gets Honey Bun is ever decided by a judge, the person who holds legal title to the dog (i.e. the person who can show proof of payment) will be entitled to walk with it.  Keeping this in mind, a pet IS nonetheless a living being (unlike the chair and the RRSPs) and when deciding who should keep it, you should consider the following:

• Who originally purchased the pet?
• What was the intention of the family at the time of purchase?  That the pet be the kids’ friend?
• Who will have primary care of the children? Keeping the pet with the kids can be very important during a divorce because it provides some stability and comfort.  Maybe the pet should travel for a while?
• Who took care of the pet while you were together? Often, parents buy the pet for the children but mom or dad ends up taking care of it full time as the children loose interest in it. Who has become the dog’s Master?
• Will a change in environment result in a change in the pet’s behaviour, including unwanted ones?
• Who has the financial means to keep the pet, i.e., to pay for the food, care and vet bill (if you don’t have a pet, do know that they can become quite expensive to maintain).  Unlike child and spousal support, you cannot get “pet support”!

As with anything else, if you go to court the decision will be made according to the law (i.e. the dog follows its legal owner), but if you settle the issue outside of court, you can be as creative as you want and use a common sense approach when it is time to decide who keeps the paws.

Get a job! The truth about spousal support

Over the summer months, Jack and Jill had lengthy discussions and arguments about how they will move forward with their separation.  For the time being, Jack has agreed to let Jill live in the family home and he has rented a nice three bedroom apartment for him and the children.  This  decision will allow Jill to put some distance between them and will help reduce the conflict to which the children have been exposed to these last few months. Jack and Jill have also had several heated discussions about child and spousal support.  Jill still works part-time and she needs additional financial support, beyond the child support she is currently receiving, to pay for household expenses while the parties continue negotiating their separation. Jack feels that Jill should finally get a full-time job and pay for her own bills. 

There are a lot of misconceptions surrounding spousal support.  “Women don’t have to pay spousal support”  “I don’t have to pay spousal support if I am not married” “Spousal support is forever”… and many more.  Spousal support is a very complex topic (even for lawyers…) and to explain it properly would take many more pages than what is available for this article.  But here are a few important things to know about spousal support.

 

• Both married spouses and common law spouses may have to pay spousal support;

• Both men and women may be ordered to pay spousal support;

• Spousal support is an amount of money that one spouse pays to the other on a monthly basis, or as a one-time lump sum payment, to achieve one or more of the following objectives:

• Recognize that one spouse has suffered an economic advantage or disadvantage and compensate that spouse for that;
• Attribute fairly between the two spouses the financial consequences that one suffers as a result of caring for the children (either during the relationship or after its breakdown);
• Help a spouse who has a financial need after the separation;
• Help a spouse to achieve financial self-sufficiency.

• When determining the amount ($$) and the duration (# of years), if any, that a spouse is entitled to receive spousal support for, the following factors will be taken into account (this is not an exhaustive list);

• The number of years during which the parties have lived together;
• The parties’ respective income;
• whether the couple still have dependent children;
• the parties' age as well as their physical and mental health;
• the parties’ standard of living during the relationship;
• the parties’ current assets and financial means, including what they are likely to get in the future;
• the capacity of the recipient to contribute to his/her own support, by working or otherwise, and the amount of time it will take him/her to achieve self-sufficiency;
• the payer’s capacity to pay support;
• whether or not the recipient has helped the other spouse to build a career or a business.

It is also important to note that the fact that a spouse has cheated on the other has no impact on how much spousal support is payable, or how long.  Also keep in mind that spousal support is tax-deductible in the payer’s hands and taxable income in the recipient’s hands.

As I said previously, spousal support is complicated and there is no hard and fast rule that governs its determination. And in addition, support entitlement and/or obligations, in certain cases, can last a very long time and you want to make sure you are paying/receiving the proper amount. So before you agree on anything about spousal support, you should meet with an experienced family lawyer (even if only for an hour) to obtain proper legal advice on this topic.