Jack and Jill have been able to reach an interim agreement
about parenting issues and the care of their two children. Unfortunately, this has not stopped them from
fighting about the kids. From Jack’s perspective, Jill is completely inflexible
in her thinking and she refuses to follow the agreement with regards to access,
consent to travel with the children, payment of the children’s expenses and so
on. Jack wonders what is the point of
having an agreement if he needs to run to his lawyer and take legal action
every time Jill does not follow the rules.
In high-conflict separations or divorces, parenting issues
may arise frequently even if the parents have signed a comprehensive parenting
agreement. Going to court every time a dispute arises is both untimely and
expensive. However, “Parenting
Coordination” could be your best option to manage those day-to-day disputes in
a timely and cost-effective manner.
How does parenting coordination work? A Parenting Coordinator is a neutral person
to whom parents can turn to when they cannot agree on matters relating to their
children. The Parenting Coordinator is usually a psychotherapist, social
worker, family lawyer, counsellor or mediator who has a significant expertise
in parenting and divorce conflict management and who has obtained a Parenting
Coordination certification. The Parenting Coordinator is hired by the parents
(by contract) or appointed by the family court (on consent of the
parents). His/her role is to help parents
come to a successful resolution of ongoing disputes as they arise between
themselves. If the parents are unable to resolve the dispute, the Parenting
Coordinator is empowered to impose a decision on them. In other words, the
decision of the Parenting Coordinator must be followed by the parents, as if
ordered by a Court.
While the cost of the Parenting Coordinator is assumed by
the parents equally (or as otherwise ordered by the Parenting Coordinator when
required to impose a decision on the parties), that cost is, without a doubt,
cheaper than the cost of two lawyers and months of court proceedings to resolve
the dispute! Most importantly, the
matter will be resolved very quickly (sometimes in a matter of days) as opposed
to taking several months through the court process. Keep in mind that, according to a wide body of
research, while separation and divorce may be a hard transition for children,
in the end, it is parental conflict that is the most harmful to children.
